Academic IELTS Writing task 1 Sample 8 - The bar chart below shows the results of a survey and shows factors affecting work performance

» You should spend about 20 minutes on this task.

The bar chart below shows the results of a survey conducted by a personnel department at a major company. The survey was carried out on two groups of workers: those aged from 18-30 and those aged 45-60, and shows factors affecting their work performance.

Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below.

»You should write at least 150 words.
Academic IELTS writing task 1 sample 8

Sample Answer 1:
The supplied bar graph compares different factors which affect the work performance of two different age group.

As is presented as a result of a survey in the given bar chart, for the both age group of 18-30 and 45-60, team spirit affects work performance equivalently and that is little over 60%. The reason ' chance for personal development' works for the younger age group about 90% which is more than twice than the older age group. The similar scenario is true for the relaxing environment too and this reason affects more than 80% of the 18-30 age group workers and about only 30% of the 45-60 years workers. About 45% younger workers' work performance is affected by the job security compared to little over 20% older workers. The only case where 45-60 years workers are influenced more than their younger counterpart is 'respect from colleagues' which is about 50% for this age group workers in contrast to 40% (approximately ) for the 15-30 years age group. The promotional prospect is an important reason that drives younger employees to work better and this reason affects 80% younger workers compared to almost 45% aged job holders.  For the lower age group job satisfaction, work environment & money affects their job performance about 50%, 30% & about 75% consecutively compared to about 45%, 30% and 70% of 45-60 years job holders.

In short , workers job performance are highly affected by chance for personal development, team spirit, promotion prospects, job satisfaction and salary.            

(Approximately 249 words)

Model Answer 2:
The given graph presents information on a variety of reasons that tend to impact job performance and it is divided by differentiating between two age categories of 18-30 years and 45-60 years. The data sample is collected from a personnel department at a big company.

Firstly, the graph shows that 90% value personal development between the age ranges of 18-30; followed by comfortable work environment and promotional prospects at an 80%. Secondly, the age range of 45- 60 are motivated by monetary aspects as 70% of the mentioned age group seem to perform better in this category. Thereafter, the particular age group values team spirit as 60% of the age range is provided in the graph chose this category after money. However, though each group varied on their factors affecting their work performance, both age groups were highly motivated and at par by team spirit (60%) and Money (70%- 74%).

[ Written by - Rashidah ]

Model Answer 3:
The given bar graph shows the results of a survey which was conducted by a company and gives data on the important factors that determine the work performance. The survey was conducted among the employees dividing them into two age groups, namely 18-30 and 45-60. As is observed from the comparison bar graphs chance for personal development, relaxed working environment, promotion prospects and salary are the main motivating factors for young people for their work performance. On the contrary, comparatively aged people's work performance are affected by the factors like money, competent boss and team spirit.

The survey results are presented in a bar graph and there are total ten factors that affect the employees' work performance. The survey was done among the people of two age groups: 18-30 and 45-60 years. The young employees put the 'chance for personal development' as the most important factor for work performance and more than 80% of them consider this as the most important factor. Relax working environment, promotion prospects and money are three other important factors for work performance for this age group. The employees of the young group place the work environment, job security and respects from colleagues are the least preferred reasons for work performance for comparatively young employees.

On the contrary, the aged people who are over 45 years old and are less than 60, consider the money and team spirit are two most important issue for their performance in the job place. Job security, relaxed working environment and work environment affect this group the least. Interestingly, the issues which are preferred by the same percentage of both age groups of employees are team spirit (60%), competent boss (50%) and job satisfaction (50%).

In summary, the survey makes it clear that the young people work hard for their personal development, promotions, money and relaxed working environment whereas the aged people perform better for money, team spirit, competent boss, promotion and job satisfaction.

Model Answer 4:
The stipulated vertical bar chart depicts the outcome of a survey carried out by the personnel department of a major company and the survey was conducted among 18-35 and 45-60 age groups in order to show various elements that influence their job efficiency.  At a glance, money is the motivating factor among both age groups.

To commence with, apparently, among both age groups of 18-35 and 45-60, team spirit motivates equal proportion of people that is 60%. Not only the chance for personal development but also the relaxed working environment is influenced youngsters about 90% and 80 % respectively which is twice than older age group. Surprisingly, competent boss and the job satisfaction have almost an equal proportion of workers satisfaction in both age groups. Apparently, job security only motivates 20 percent of elders whereas, it is among youngsters 40. Even though, 80% youngsters are motivated by promotion prospects, in the case of the old group, only 45% work for promotion. Interestingly, both age groups take money as the most equally encouraging factor to work with 75% while work environment was least with 30%.

To conclude, youngsters give great value to chance for personal development at workplaces.

[ Written by - Tony ]

1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 Rating 4.08 (12 Votes)

Comments   

0 # Ricardo 2016-06-01 23:05
Just one question, for example if I say:

"Job Security", "Respect from colleagues" and "Job Satisfaction"show results of 40%, 40% and 30% respectively for the younger group and 20%, about 45% and 45% for the older group respectively as well.

The question is "may I use that "as well" at the end? What other ways would be better to write this.

Thanks in advance for your help.
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+3 # Sonal 2016-04-06 06:41
The given diagram shows the outcome of a survey that portrays factors affecting the work performance in an office based on the feedback of people of two different age groups: 18-30 and 45-60. There are various issues and variables which influence the work performance of an employee and in this graph, these factors are divided into 10 major categories.

In general, people aged from 45 to 60 mostly believe that money is the main motivating factor for employees performance as around 73% of these peoples’ vote went for money as the reason for better work performance. According to those people 60% influences come from team spirit. The same opinion came for team spirit from the younger group. Those who are between 18 to 30 years old opine that working for personal development, is the main motivation for performance. Young generation also wants relaxed environment where they can work easily and without any kind of hesitation. This factor received about 80% nomination from the young employees. Other important factors that affect the work performance include job security, competent boos, job satisfaction, and good colleagues.

In conclusion, aged people mostly works to earn money and young people looks for personal development and promotions.
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+4 # Femy 2016-01-10 01:52
The bar provided chart shows the result of a survey conducted among workers in company to analyze their work performance as the cut across ten different factors as shown in the chart. The workers are grouped into 2 categories- those between the age of 18-30 and those between ages 45-60.

In six out of the ten factors surveyed, the 18-30 group is shown to be more affected than the age 45-60 group. These factors are: chance for personal development, relaxed working environment, promotion prospects, job satisfaction and money. Furthermore, 2 out of the remaining four factors (team spirit and work environment) had been influential equally amount of workers from both groups and the age 45-60 group dominated in the remaining two factors.

To sum up, the chance for “personal development” and “work environment” factors had the largest and smallest influences amount workers of 18-30 workers of 90% and 30% respectively. However, “job security” was referred as the factors affecting work performance had the smallest ratio recorded in all factors of 18% which was from the 45-60 age group.
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0 # Mmela 2015-11-21 09:47
The bar graph illustrates ten factors that affect work performance of employees aged 18-30 years and 45-60 years. Overall, the preference of the two age groups varies in all the categories. Team spirit and work environment are equally valued by both groups with around 60% and close to 30% respectively.

The younger age group identifies chance for personal development as the most important factor with approximately more than 80%; while they considered work environment as the least with only about 30%.

For the employees aged 45-60, money which is more than 60%, is noted to be the most important factor for them while job security which is only a little above 20%, is the least.

Moreover, relaxed working environment appears to be more important for young employees than for the old ones. The latter has only about 30% in this category which is barely half of the former’s close to 80%.
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+2 # John 2015-06-29 19:33
The bar chart gives information given by human resources department of some big companies about factors that influence performance of workers separated in two groups according to their age: from 18 to 30 and from 45 to 60 years old.

According to inquiry, there are six factors in those quantities in both categories approximately equal namely, team spirit (about 65 people voted), competent boss (nearly 55 employees answered), respect from colleagues (45 and 48 workers appreciated it), job satisfaction (roughly 53 laborers agreed), works environment (approximately 30 workers decided it as important) and money (from 70 to 72 workers).

On the other hand, there are four other factors on those questioned employees’ opinions differ. Thus, respondents from 18-30 group voted for chance for personal development as twice as other group (90). The next question included relaxed working environment (younger group won by 80 points to 30). Job security was chosen more by previous winner, 40 versus 20 people. Continuing the trend of younger group, promotional prospects were thought by them as the key factor that improved performance in 80 cases while their opponents’ figure was only 50.

[186 words]
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+11 # Kesikan 2015-05-08 12:48
The given bar chart enumerates the statistical result of a survey among workers of different age groups on various factors influencing their work performance.

As per the data of 18-30 years age group, more than 80% of the respondents consider that chance for personal development as the most important factor affecting their efficacy. Other factors like relaxed environment, promotion prospects, and money were considered relatively important by 60-80 per cent of the employees. Less than 40 per cent of the workers find that work place, job safety and respect from the co-workers are important criteria for their performance.

Whereas the option of workers of the age 45-60 years differ from the employees of 18-30 years old. Above 60% of them opt money as the important reason affecting their performance. Secondly, promotion, job satisfaction and competent manager influence them as is chosen by 40-60%. Surprising, only 2 in 10 find that job security is important for them.

It is interesting to notice that equal number of both the age group of employees find that team spirit, money and work environment as a factor affecting their performance.

Overall, chance for personal development, working environment, promotion and salary were considered as the important factor for the workers performance.
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-1 # Rano 2016-06-21 14:04
The provided bar chart shows a survey result carried out at a personnel department of a private company between two age groups: from 18-30 and 45-60. According to the result of this survey, ten different factors affect the employee performance. Young employee mostly preferred working environment, career growth, and salary as the most important variables for increased productivity.

As is visible in bar chart, team spirit is an important factor for better performance in job field which affects equivalently on both groups of employees. Most important factor according to the young people is chance for personal development which was emphasized by the young employees almost double than the worker ages 45-60. Furthermore other younger group of employees search relaxed working environment. In addition other significant factor in output of employees is salary according to the both groups and measured about 72% and 75%. There is no big difference between both groups' opinion in case of competent boss, job satisfaction, and work environment as factors for increased performance. Promotional prospects among young employees works as a good motivation for better performance.

The graph summaries that work performances are affected by different factors and they might vary based on employee age. Some common factors for better performance according to the young employees are better working environment, salary, changes for career growth, opportunity for skill development. Money, team spirit are common factors between the both age groups of employees.
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