IELTS Writing Task 2 sample answer (band score 8-9)
IELTS Essay # 1256 - Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information
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IELTS Writing Task 2/ IELTS Essay:
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.
Write about the following topic:
Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Write at least 250 words.
Model Answer 1: [Opinion: Employers should not ask for such personal information]
In the process of job application, some employers may ask for personal information such as hobbies, marital status, interests and so on. Some individuals argue that these details can be important and pertinent for the job, while others differ. In this essay, I will examine both perspectives. As far as my opinion goes, employers should not ask for such information to determine the suitability of an applicant for a job position.
On the one hand, people who support the inclusion of personal information in job applications suggest that it allows employers to understand a candidate's character and suitability for the position. For instance, a hobby such as playing sports could demonstrate an applicant's ability to work in a team, while knowledge of foreign languages could highlight their adaptability and willingness to learn new things. Additionally, providing information about one's marital status might be useful in jobs that require relocation or long hours, as it could reveal the candidate's flexibility and family responsibilities.
On the other hand, those who argue against including personal information in job applications believe that it can lead to discrimination and bias. Some employers may use this information to make assumptions about the candidate's gender, age, or ethnicity, which could result in unfair treatment or a missed opportunity for the applicant. For instance, a married female candidate may be perceived as less committed and less likely to accept long working hours. Additionally, providing personal information may not be relevant to the job requirements and could be considered an invasion of privacy.
In my opinion, employers should not ask for personal information in job applications as it could lead to unfair treatment and bias. Discrimination based on gender, age, ethnicity, or marital status is unacceptable and can prevent highly qualified candidates from being hired. I believe that it is more appropriate to evaluate candidates based on their skills, qualifications, and work experience, rather than their personal information.
In conclusion, employers should focus on evaluating candidates based on their qualifications and work experience rather than their personal information. This way, the job recruitment process would be more transparent and effective.
Model Answer 2: [Opinion: Employers may ask for such personal information]
The inclusion of personal information, such as hobbies, marital status, and interests, in job applications has sparked a contentious debate. While some argue that this information is relevant and beneficial for employers, others assert that it encroaches on privacy and should be omitted. This essay will explore both perspectives and present arguments emphasizing the need to include such personal information in job applications.
On the one hand, antagonists of including personal information on their job applications contend that soliciting personal information is unnecessary and could lead to discriminatory hiring practices. In many countries, laws have been enacted to protect against bias based on factors like marital status or hobbies. For instance, a single parent seeking employment may face unfair treatment due to assumptions about their ability to balance work and family responsibilities. Moreover, relying on personal information may divert attention from a candidate's qualifications and professional experience, leading to a less objective hiring process.
On the other hand, proponents of requesting personal information in job applications argue that it offers employers valuable insights into the candidate's personality and compatibility with the company culture. For example, a candidate who expresses an interest in community service and volunteering may exhibit a strong sense of social responsibility and teamwork, qualities that align with a company's corporate social responsibility initiatives. Additionally, knowing a candidate's marital status could be relevant for job positions that require extensive travel or relocation, as it may impact the individual's availability and willingness to relocate. Finally, including personal information such as hobbies and interests allows candidates to emphasize their suitability for a job and get attention from the hiring managers. Thus the information could be seen as useful rather than detrimental.
In conclusion, the inclusion of personal information in job applications presents some challenges and could create some biases. But it is undeniable that certain details offer valuable insights into a candidate's suitability for a role, and present the applicants an opportunity to advertise their suitability for a job. Therefore, it is expected that employers should ask for relevant personal information and adhere to fair hiring practices, creating a transparent and equitable recruitment process.
Idea Generation for this IELTS Essay:
Essay Question:
Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Essay Type:
Discussion Essay.
The main question of this IELTS Essay:
A) Why do some people believe personal information such as hobbies, interests, and marital status is relevant in job applications?
B) Why do others believe it is irrelevant and inappropriate to ask for such information?
C) Your opinion on this.
Reasons why personal information may be relevant and useful:
1. Understanding personality and team fit:
Knowing an applicant's hobbies and interests can help employers evaluate whether the candidate will fit the company's culture and existing team dynamics. Shared interests may enhance workplace collaboration. For instance, someone interested in sports might easily integrate into a team-oriented environment, enhancing overall morale and productivity.
2. Assessing commitment and flexibility:
Information about marital status could indicate a candidate’s availability or willingness to relocate or work flexible hours. Employers can thus make informed decisions regarding job roles that require extensive travelling or irregular shifts. For example, a single individual may be more flexible with relocation compared to someone who has family commitments.
3. Identifying additional skills and competencies:
Hobbies can reveal extra skills beneficial to the workplace, such as leadership, teamwork, or creativity. Employers can leverage these talents in specific roles. To illustrate, an applicant who actively participates in debating clubs might possess strong communication and persuasion skills beneficial in marketing roles.
4. Predicting job satisfaction and retention:
Personal information can help employers gauge a candidate’s long-term satisfaction in the role, potentially reducing staff turnover. For instance, someone passionate about technology might find a tech-related job more fulfilling, leading to longer employment.
5. Enhancing diversity and inclusion:
Employers may seek personal details to promote diversity and create inclusive environments. Recognising diverse interests and backgrounds can strengthen team dynamics and workplace morale. For example, a company that values diversity may actively seek individuals with unique hobbies and varied cultural interests to enrich the workplace environment.
Reasons why personal information may be irrelevant and intrusive:
1. Potential for discrimination:
Requesting personal details such as marital status can unintentionally lead to discrimination or biased hiring decisions. For example, employers might overlook married women, assuming they have less time for work-related responsibilities due to family commitments.
2. Privacy concerns:
Candidates may feel uncomfortable sharing sensitive personal information, fearing misuse or invasion of privacy. For instance, applicants may question why an employer needs details about their marital status or private interests for job roles unrelated to these aspects.
3. Lack of relevance to job performance:
Personal information such as hobbies often has no direct correlation with professional capabilities or job performance. For example, being an avid football player may not necessarily translate into being a competent accountant.
4. Focus distraction from essential qualifications:
Emphasising personal interests could divert attention from assessing relevant skills, qualifications, and experience necessary for the job. Employers might overlook highly skilled candidates who prefer privacy or do not engage in popular leisure activities.
5. Privacy concerns and data misuse:
Collecting unnecessary personal information increases the risk of data breaches and misuse of sensitive data. For instance, companies storing applicants' private details may inadvertently expose them to security risks, identity theft, or privacy violations.
First of all, enterprises require applicants to provide their personal data if they want to know their personality and background. In most CVs, only the working experience and educational background can be seen. And information like hobbies and interests are important as they reflect what kind of persons the applicants are, and managers in the companies can then figure out which position suits the application best. For instance, if someone's hobbies are playing football, basketball or volleyball, it implies that the person would contain teamwork ability and have a higher chance to collaborate with other colleagues seamlessly. In other words, getting to know more about who the person is in terms of what he or she loves to do would definitely help the companies to select the right person. If the wrong person was chosen to fit the job vacancy, both time and money will be wasted.
On the other hand, there is a common belief that enterprises knowing more personal data would infringe on privacy. People think that having the hard skill to complete the job is already enough. Why do companies require applicants to say what they like to do(!) It seems too personal. Take marriage as an example. What does the manager want to do if an applicant is single or married? Will marital status affect someone's working ability?
In conclusion, although it is a common thought that a company should not require applicants to provide extra personal data, I believe giving out what the applicant would like to do is harmless in the interviewing process. Personally, I think companies ought to list out the usage of the data which abides by the government's law on personal data collection. In that way, applicants would be more comfortable in providing personal data.
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