IELTS Writing Task 2 sample answer (band score 8-9)

IELTS Essay # 1166 - Some countries include a relatively large number of young adults

IELTS Writing Task 2/ IELTS Essay:

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.

Write about the following topic.

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Write at least 250 words.


 

Model Answer 1: [Opinion: The advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages.]

In recent times, some countries have seen a significant increase in the number of young adults in their population, while the number of older people remains relatively low. This demographic situation has led to debates on whether the advantages of having a predominantly young population outweigh the disadvantages. This essay will assess both the pros and cons of this situation and conclude that having a large proportion of youths has more advantages than demerits.

One advantage of having a large population of young adults is the potential for economic growth. Young adults are typically more productive and innovative and are more likely to start businesses that can contribute to economic growth. Additionally, a large pool of young workers can help offset the financial burden of providing healthcare and pensions for an ageing population. For example, countries like India and China have a significant young population, which has contributed to their rapid economic growth in recent years.

A high population of young adults can also have negative consequences. One of the main disadvantages is the potential for high unemployment rates, particularly if there is not enough demand for labour. This can lead to social unrest and political instability. Additionally, a young population can also lead to a lack of experienced workers, which can create skill shortages in certain industries, such as healthcare and education.

Despite the potential disadvantages, I believe that the advantages of having a relatively large number of young adults in a population outweigh the disadvantages. The economic benefits of a young population are too significant to ignore, particularly in developing countries that are trying to achieve rapid economic growth.

In conclusion, while having a large population of young adults has both advantages and disadvantages, I believe that the benefits outweigh the drawbacks. Governments should focus on developing policies and programs to maximize the potential economic benefits of a young population while mitigating the potential negative consequences.


Sample Answer 2: [Opinion: The advantages of it outweigh the disadvantages.]

Youths in some nations, including some Asian, African and Western countries, comprise the highest percentage of the total population. Having a larger proportion of youth is considered to have many advantages as well as demerits for a country. I personally believe that a country reaps more benefits from its active and young workforce.

Having a large proportion of young adults and a relatively low percentage of seniors may lead to a disbalance in the demography of a nation and bring some negative consequences. Unemployment could be one such significant negative outcome which can lead to increasing crime rates, social unrest and political instability. Moreover, elderly people have vast experience and wisdom that are vital for many important state positions. With their diminishing numbers, the nation may struggle to find suitable elderly to fill those positions. For instance, elderly politicians, writers, researchers and doctors have more to contribute to society than their younger counterparts.

On the other hand, the young generation is dynamic, and energetic, and can contribute to the job sector which has a huge positive impact on the economic development of the country. They come with fresh ideas and are free from old dogma. It gives them a competitive advantage in bringing innovations. It is undeniable that the educated young generation is the best resource a country can have, and their contribution to the country is significantly higher than the participation of children and elder people. For instance, technological development is mostly driven by youths and many countries reap the benefits of technological advancements from their relatively higher younger populations.

To conclude, older people should not be considered a burden for the country; however, the young have more to contribute to society and the country as a whole. This is why it is more beneficial for a country to have an active and innovative workforce than dependent senior citizens.



Idea Generation for this IELTS Essay:

Essay question:
At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Essay type:
Advantage  & Disadvantage Essay.

Main question of this essay:
Does having a larger population of young adults than older people create more benefits or more drawbacks?
 

Advantages of having a younger population:

1. Increased workforce productivity:
Young adults contribute to economic growth as they make up a highly active and energetic workforce. They bring innovation and adaptability to industries, which enhances national productivity. For instance, countries like India and China have benefited from their large youth populations, driving technological and economic advancements.

2. Greater innovation and technological advancements:
Younger generations are more likely to adopt and develop new technologies, pushing industries toward modernization and efficiency. Their fresh ideas and creativity contribute to progress. To cite an example, young entrepreneurs in Silicon Valley have revolutionized sectors like artificial intelligence and e-commerce.

3. Lower dependency ratio:
A younger population means fewer retired individuals depending on government pensions and social welfare systems. This helps maintain a balanced economy with fewer financial burdens on the state. For instance, countries with an aging population, like Japan, struggle with higher social security expenses, whereas nations with a younger demographic face fewer such challenges.

4. More dynamic and adaptable society:
Younger people are generally more open to change, leading to a progressive and modern society that embraces cultural and technological shifts. As an example, social reforms such as gender equality and environmental conservation have gained momentum due to active youth participation.

5. A strong and energetic military force:
Countries with a large number of young adults have a strong pool of military recruits, ensuring national security and stability. For instance, nations like the United States maintain a robust defense system due to their youthful military personnel.
 

Disadvantages of having a younger population:

1. High unemployment rates:
A surplus of young job seekers can lead to fierce competition, making it difficult for many to secure employment. This can result in frustration and economic instability. For example, some developing nations face high youth unemployment despite economic growth, leading to increased social unrest.

2. Strain on educational and healthcare systems:
More young people mean a greater demand for educational facilities and healthcare services, which can overwhelm existing infrastructure. To illustrate, countries with rapid population growth struggle to provide adequate schools, leading to overcrowded classrooms and limited resources.

3. Increased crime rates and social instability:
If job opportunities are scarce, some young adults may turn to crime or anti-social activities, leading to societal instability. As an example, high unemployment among the youth in urban areas has been linked to rising crime rates in various parts of the world.

4. Political instability and youth-driven protests:
Younger generations often demand change, which can lead to frequent protests and social movements, sometimes destabilizing governments. For instance, many recent political uprisings worldwide have been led by discontented youth seeking reforms.

5. Environmental challenges due to rapid urbanization:
A booming young population often leads to increased urbanization, which puts pressure on natural resources and infrastructure. To give an example, rapidly growing cities in Africa and Asia struggle with pollution and traffic congestion due to rising populations.



Sample Answer 3: [Opinion: The disadvantages of this situation outweigh the advantages.]

In several parts of the world today, the proportion of young adults significantly surpasses that of elderly citizens. While this demographic structure offers certain economic and social benefits, it also has some significant drawbacks. This essay will discuss both perspectives and opine that the drawbacks associated with such a population imbalance outweigh the positive aspects.

On the positive side, a youthful population can energise the economy and foster innovation. Younger adults generally have greater adaptability and creativity, which facilitates technological advances and productivity growth. For example, countries like India have capitalised on their youthful demographics to expand sectors such as information technology, benefiting from dynamic, tech-savvy workforces. Moreover, young people often represent a dynamic consumer base, driving demand for goods and services, and thereby stimulating economic activity.

However, the disadvantages of having a significantly younger population should not be underestimated. Firstly, high unemployment rates often arise when job creation cannot keep pace with a growing young population. Increased competition for limited employment opportunities leads to higher levels of youth unemployment, fostering dissatisfaction, social unrest, and increased crime rates. This phenomenon is evident in several countries across Africa and Asia, where unemployment among young adults frequently triggers protests and social instability.

Furthermore, an expanding youth population places immense strain on public infrastructure, especially educational and healthcare systems. Governments must invest significantly in building additional schools, universities, hospitals, and housing, diverting funds from other critical development areas. For instance, rapidly growing young populations in developing nations frequently result in overcrowded classrooms, overstretched healthcare services, and insufficient housing, undermining the quality of life.

In conclusion, despite the economic vitality and innovation potential associated with a predominantly young demographic, the adverse effects, including high unemployment, social instability, and excessive strain on infrastructure, clearly outweigh these benefits.

1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 Rating 3.76 (76 Votes)

Sagar Garad
In this contemporary era, all nations are focusing on the empowerment of youths, who are the future of the nation. Some countries have a higher percentage of younger people compared to older people. In my opinion, this is a favourable situation for the nation because it will serve as extra manpower as well as lead the world toward technological advancements as youths are more adept in using and developing technology.

The more the proportion of younger people in a country, the more will increase the production of goods in the factories. As the young generation can do hard work, they can use this for the advancement of their organisations. The manufacturing industry, for instance, required young foremen to produce various products. With a great number of young people, a country can become a manufacturing hub like China. Moreover, young people can work longer hours and put their energy towards increasing production in almost all industries in a country. Without the youths, a country's production is greatly halted.

Although older people have work experience, they are not good at handling new technologies. In this cutting edge, all governments emphasise technology. However old people have less capacity with new software and hardware technologies. My grandparents, for example, do not know how to operate mobile phones or computers. If they want to send a message they take my help. This is why the older generation can contribute little towards the technological development of a nation.

In conclusion, although the old population has the experience, the young generation has better capability to contribute towards the production and technological development of a country.

Yamuna
At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh its disadvantages?

Sample Answer:
Some countries have a large proportion of the young population compared to others where the ratio of elderly people is so high. Having a higher proportion of an active and young generation has some distinct benefits as well as some detriments. I believe that a higher ratio of young people in a country is more advantageous.

To commence with, a higher percentage of young adults in a country means an active population that can contribute to economic activities. It can help the nation develop in any sectors like industrialisati on, production, healthcare, education, irrigation, and infrastructural development. For instance, to develop good infrastructure a country needs young people who can actively work. It is inevitable that if the country has more young adults then the per capita income and GDP of the country will be high. Moreover, the young generation can take bold and innovative initiatives that can take the country to new heights. For instance, without skilled and trained young IT professionals, it is hard for any country in the world to develop in this era of technology. Moreover, a country needs to spend more money on the healthcare sector if it has a more elderly population.

On the other hand, having more elderly people means a nation has so many mentors who can advise us. Those elderly people have vast experience in different sectors and we need their mentorship. A sector that is run only by young adults is often doomed to fail due to the lack of experience. They can look after our young generations and guide us in the right direction when need their expert opinions.

To conclude, although elderly people are good mentors due to their immense experience, a country needs more young adults for their unstoppable spirit, bold actions and ability to contribute to economic development.

Former IELTS Examiner
This essay has such annoying basic grammatical mistakes, particularly with ''articles''.. it uses (the) so many times mistakenly! The 2 body paragraphs are not balanced at all, which is critically damaging TA. Also, many sentences are used as ''filling expressions''. When you feel like a sentence would not serve the main idea, omit it! I have a feeling that this candidate can write much better essays than this one, and this can be seen due to the wide range of vocabulary he uses besides his/her good command on cohesion.TA: 6CC: 8LR: 8GRA: 6OVERALL: 7
Md Tanim Bin Zaman
It gave quite a vivid explanation of putting the younger generation in favour, at the same time couldn't deny the contribution of the older generation. As a whole, I think there is always an urgency to give away the places for younger generation for better and brighter development of a country.
Parminder
Please send me speaking cue card topics between January and April 2018.